It’s Not a Hormone Thing I Swear

Given the last scene of Heroes tonight which is supposed to hold us over until next season, I was inspired to write a blog about how the majority of women on this show I hate with every fiber of my being.  It would be a shorter blog if I just listed the current female cast I actually like:  Angela, Mrs. Bennett.  See?  Short. But since it’s by far easier to complain about something then praise, let me talk of the women I hate.

Claire 

I probably hate her the least, but hate…yes, I do honestly hate her.  I liked Claire initially.  She was just a teenager discovering she couldn’t die.  High school is hard enough as it is, but to be an actual freak, that must be insane.  That said, since last season her character has been unbearable, mainly because the show wants us to buy Hayden as a leading lady.  Um, no.  Her acting is fine for the most part, but her angelic face as well as what I hope is a bad wig keep me from taking her seriously.  Placing Goldilocks in leather with a ponytail does not Aeon Flux make, and it’s just as silly to see her throw out threats to Sylar.  What’s more disturbing is Sylar has now become obsessed with her, in a Stefano craves Marlena way that takes over almost everything he was doing in the finale.  For that alone, I suppose enclosing him in Nathan’s body might have been worth it, but if there was any moments I enjoyed Claire was when she was with Nathan.  And now they have taken that away from me as I know somehow there will be Sylar/Claire bonding here.  If his Claire obsession was bad enough before, it will be ten times worth once he awakens and remembers his recent experiences with her.

Maya

I know she isn’t part of the current cast but since they keep bringing back actresses I loathe, I’m sure she won’t be far behind.  I hated Maya from the very beginning.  Her power sucked and since I didn’t know her, I felt no sympathy.  Her black tears were creepy and watching her brother attempt to come to America lasted far too long w/o any interaction with other heroes. Likewise, while I usually enjoyed watching almost all the heroes powers in action, these two together was nothing short of torture.  Maya’s incessant crying didn’t help.  And the running joke that Mohinder became bugman because he slept with her wasn’t an accident.  That’s how much people hate her.

Janice

Probably the character I hate the most.  I couldn’t stand her, not from the first episode.  The fact she actively cheated on her husband with his asshole PARTNER told me all I needed to know.  Bitch, and she did not deserve to be his big love.  Now they have brought her back, and while I never really got on board with team Daphne, her relationship with Matt deserved more than to be immediately forgotten the moment he runs into his ex.  When the spoilers said Matt was going to have a dark side in tonight’s episode, I had hoped it meant he would kill Janice.  But nothing ever goes my way.

Any character played by Ali Larter

I liked Niki/Jessica for the first season.  However, that was mainly due to D. W. and Micah so with the former’s death in the second season, AL overstayed her welcome.  I admit the woman is gorgeous, but when she was paired up with Nathan as Tracy, they were so boring together you could actually hear the match TRYING to spark a flame.  But it never took.  I cheered when she died but of course the show has to ruin that by allowing her to turn into water (and materialize as a naked Tracy, perhaps their need to use the Internet to dictate some storylines have allowed too many horny teenagers get their say) and DROWNING her victims.  It reminds me of the Wonder Twins where one has the lame power of turning into liquid form.  I remember once he turned into a bucket of water.  And I would much rather watch that then Tracy’s return, in solid or liquid form.

Mohinder

I know, technically he’s not a woman, but don’t you guys remember the scarves? Outside of Maya, he’s probably the weakest character on the show.  I bet Claire could kick his ass.  Sure, remind me has that super strength power, but I still think Claire could kick his ass.  Also, if the writers need someone to make an unwise choice or come to the WRONG decision, let’s bet they will use Mr. Suresh.  Then to allow him to take his uselessness further, I’m FED UP with his voiceovers.  The first season they were semi necessary as openers.  It got your attention while easing into the episode.  It was a new series and if you have too much action in every early episode, it makes plot setup and character development nearly impossible.  But is there anything more annoying then Heroes taking these WTF episodes and allowing Mohinder to guide us to the credits?  I’m not sure how I feel about Sylar becoming Nathan.  Ok, I am sure I hate it but I’m trying to digest it as well as pretend I never saw Tracy enter an apartment using the kitchen sink, but Mohinder’s voice trying to project philosophical phrases is as spiritual as the phrases that come out of fortune cookies.]

Advertisements

7 thoughts on “It’s Not a Hormone Thing I Swear

  1. First, BWAH!!! HEHEH Love it. Second, who’s Arlene? I’m confused. Third, Mohinder is totally a girl!

    I was fine with Claire in season 1 as well. I thought she was rather annoying but she was a teenager and understandable. Them trying to turn her into some female version of HRG? Epic fail.

    I don’t care about Janice on way or another but the rest of the list is dead on. The only female cast members I have ever liked end up dead, unless they’re Angela. Why must they always get it wrong?

  2. Okay, when Ando asked Mohinder to help Hiro, I thought for certain Hiro was a goner. I mean, doesn’t everything he touches turn to crap?

    Also, I’m so angry that Tracey/Niki/Jessica/Everywoman is getting another shot on this show. I hate her.

  3. Interesting observations but I have to disagree. If I still cared about the show, at all, I would hate Claire the most. She’s continually linked with the characters I did care about while the rest were like inconsequential background noise. Janice who? Don’t really care.

    My reaction to Sylar’s newfound neurosis with Claire was to laugh, out loud. That and overwhelming commiseration for poor Zachary Quinto who had to act those scenes.

    While I do think that trapping Sylar in Nathan’s form has it’s potential, I don’t trust this show for a one moment to make the best of it.

    Last but not least: Mohinder. So Pretty. So Girl.

  4. Isn’t Arlene Mrs. Bennett? Oh, I’d look it up but I doubt she will be of much consequence. I like her so they don’t hardly use her.

    Slynn, I thought of another character actually. Molly. Perhaps you should add in your own paragraph.

    Rameau, I hadn’t thought about ZQ’s having to stomach through scenes of being obsessed with Claire. I’m obviously not giving him enough acting credit.

  5. Molly. Oh man, just when I thought I’d erased her from my memory… hey, maybe I can get Parkman to do that for me! That would be sweet!

    Molly who?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s